It had to be him
by UntiedGeneration
Summary: This story takes place after Chapter 11 of Beyond the Letters.. When another girl appeared in front of Nicole and told about her heart's desire. "I know now that I love him, but I also know that we are not meant to be"- a simple realization of Nicole.
1. Chapter 1

Untiedgeneration: Thank you for giving me a hundred review in "Beyond the letters". This is a special chapter dedicated to all LavixNicole fans. Please enjoy! –smiles-

**Disclaimer: I do not own D. Gray-man**

* * *

><p>It was one of those sleepless nights. I was lying on my bed looking at the same ceiling. While remembering the times of my world, I realized that I was more and more homesick. Sometimes I cried silently as I could. I did not want anyone to be bothered by my woes.<p>

After a week from my first mission, I was able to walk properly from all the injuries that I got. While walking, I finally felt that my stomach was growling. I couldn't blame myself. More like, I deserved a lot of food today, but I wondered if that food I picked would affect my secret. They did not know that I was from the Philippines, not yet.

I guessed that everything that did not involve any tomatoes would do nicely, I thought. Contented, I made a trip to the cafeteria.

Along the way, I suddenly stopped by Johnny.

"Hello? Nicole" he said nervously "Going somewhere?"

"Yeah, I'm going to the cafeteria" I smiled and I was about to go inside.

"You can't"

"I can't?" I lifted a brow. "How come?"

"Uh... Well... The cafeteria's a mess because of Komui's inventions got berserk. I don't want you to experience trauma like Allen did"

"Komui's inventions?" it had been a long time since I heard those two words. It the only thing that can make a whole Order go into lunacy. I always wondered why he would do me such crazy inventions.

Since I did not like annoying things and I just recovered from my injury, I thank Johnny and went the other way... That was a big mistake

The moment that I turned around, I saw a hug robot with a white beret on his head. My body stiffened as its head was right in front of me. I knew what it was. It was Komurin

"Uhhh... J-Johnny?" I stuttered and shakingly pointed at the robot. "Is this his inventions?"

"Y-Yes..." it just had to be his answer. "Nicole run!"

Komurin went closer and closer. I stepped back, trying to escape its glare. I was not sure what abilities that that robot had and I did not want to find out.

"Exorcist Nicole" it said. "Has injury on the left shoulder" Then, robotic arms suddenly appeared. They wrapped around my waist and my arm.

"Time to change your bandages" I did not like it one bit. Why the hell was the bucket of bolts still alive, I thought. I struggled, but resistance was futile. I was immediately injected a dose of anesthetic to keep me numbed

My whole upper body could not move anymore. As I went closer to the robot's door, I saw little Komui robots with different instruments. When I was already inside, they had already taken off my shirt and change the bandages. I was relieved for two things: I did not have to go back to the infirmary anymore for my wound is properly dressed, and no one was around to see my bare skin.

"At least this one is decent" I said to myself. Then I heard a crash on the other side. I could not see what was going on because it was dark. "Hello? Is someone there?"

There was no response.

I thought it was my imagination. However the room tilted and I began to lose balance. Just when I was about to crash, I felt someone catching me. I felt warm and secured, but I could not see who that person was.

I heard explosions from outside, and I felt the room was going narrower and narrower until there was a small streak of light that appeared.

The minute that I was outside, I was about to fall to the hard ground. I suddenly sensed that I was already covered from damage.

"Are you alright Nicole?" I heard Lenalee's voice. I guessed that she was the one who destroyed the robot.

"Yeah, I'm-" I opened my eyes and I found myself in a very awkward position. Lavi shielded me the whole time, and that was a good thing. However, he was on top of me, and to make things worse, our upper bodies were almost bare and close.

Lavi lifted himself from me. He opened his eye and saw my flustered face. It was then he realized the position we had.

"P-p-princess-"

I shrieked at the top of my lungs and I kicked him on the stomach for my upper body was still a bit numb. I seriously was about to cry until someone covered me with a blanket. I forced my arms to wrapped it around me as I felt utter humiliation.

"There, there... You're fine now" Miranda was the one who placed the blanket on me. I suddenly made a childish voice right on the spot.

"Miranda..." I said bitterly. " I will never get married. This is sexual harassment. Komui is an enemy of women."

"Brother, say sorry to Nicole" Lenalee was beating his brother to a pulp.

"B-b-b-but Lenalee! I didn't do it this time" Komui wept as he tried to convince the others that it was not at fault... No one believed him.

"Are you alright?" Lavi went closer to me, but this time was wearing his usual shirt. He reached out his hand as he tried to pull me up. But I could not accept his offer. For when I saw his face, I remembered that moment.

"G-Get away from me!" I shouted and I hid behind Miranda's back. I blinked a few times and I realized my action.

"Uhh... I mean... I should go." I calmly stood up and walked away.

When no one was looking, I ran fast as I could. My heart was racing with an abnormal rate. This was the first that that someone, specifically a guy, saw my bare skin… and it had to be Lavi again.

Why? why did it have to be him? I did not get it at all. We was always with me, so I thought that it was normal because I was a record to him. What with this feeling? I felt so uncomfortable whenever I think about him. My mouth felt so dry and my eyes hardly met his. He was suppose to be my favorite character right? That was all there was to it.

"Ouch!" I realized that I had already bumped into someone. It was another girl. She was the same age as me. she had long black hair and brown eyes, and she was wearing a finders uniform.

"Sorry, my bad…" I said as I helped her with my free hand while my other hand was still holding the blanket.

"Thank yo-Oh my glob!" She panicked as she saw a peek of my skin. "Where are your clothes?"

"Huh.. Uh.. I was caught in an accident a few minutes ago, so I was going back to my room." I explained. She immediately grabbed me and pulled me somewhere.

"Where's your room? I'll cover your while you get there." She said. I was about to deny, but she pulled me almost immediately. She seemed nice, she was helping a stranger like me. So, I guided her to my room. Once there, she began rummaging in my closet. She noticed that I had a few clothes.

"What's with these clothes?" She asked and I laughed weakly.

"Well… My recruitment here was really unexpected" She sighed and took a shirt and gave it to me.

"Thanks" I said and I immediately wore it.

We sat down for a moment and she stared at me intensively. Was there something on my face, I wondered. Then she said.

"You have really cool eyes! Blue and red! You're the rumored Exorcist right?" she smiled so gleefully. "Ah, sorry. I'm new here. My name is Vronne"

"I'm Nicole." I smiled back. She reminded me from people from my school. I guessed it was not so bad thinking back. There were times that I really had fun and she helped me remember that. "So, where are you from Vronne?"

"Uhm… My home is really far, I can't really tell you…" She answered, but I understood her. I did not want to tell her about my home either.

"It's okay; you don't have to tell me. I know the feeling" I sighed. She looked at me again. And she smiled again and I asked.

"Am I really famous?" I said.

"Don't you listen to the rumors?"

"Not really, I don't really care much about silly gossips" I replied.

"Well you're one of the rare people who have different color eyes, which is awesome by the way." she said happily. "When I see you know, you look like a person in love."

"A… Person… In.. LOVE?" I was shocked of what I had heard. "That-that-that is impossible! You're talking to a person who does not have a crush since birth! You shouldn't expect that something from me Vronne; we just met after all and saying that too early-"

"Denial..." She interrupted

"Do not!" I retorted.

"Then what's this then?" She then pulled out something from her pocket and showed it to me. it was one of my drawings, my casual version of Lavi.

"Where did you get that?" I blushed as I immediately grabbed my drawing.

"I found it in your closet" She smirked. "It's a nice drawing by the way."

"Don't change the subject!" I huffed. "I am not in love with Lavi!"

"Oh, so that's his name."

"That's not the point here!"

"Then what is he to you then?" She asked. I wanted to answer that he was my favorite character in the series, or that he was one of the characters that saved in my dramatic highschool life. However, that would make thing a little more complicated.

"He's someone that I admire, but not in a romantic way!" I answered that instead, but she had that unsatisfied look on her face. "Just who are you anyway?"

"Like I said, I'm Vronne. And I am here to help you." She was weird, but I saw no reason for her to lie. I was confused and baffled. Why would she help me? I wondered if she knew about my situation, that I was from another world. But I couldn't say that in front of her, she might think that I was exaggerated in my story.

"Look, if I can prove that you are in love with him-"

"Weren't you listening?" I huffed, but she was not about to give up. She was about to say something until we heard a knock on the door.

"Princess, are you alright?" Speak of the devil, I thought. Why was he looking for me? I felt like he made the situation worse. I stood up and opened that door. He looked worried and guilty when he finally saw me.

"Is there something wrong?" I said as I wondered what worried him.

"I…I…just want to say sorry about earlier," I almost forgotten about the incident thanks for Vronne, so I smiled calmly and looked at him.

"There's no need to apologize Lavi, but I'm sorry for kicking you in the stomach" I said. Unexpectedly, Lavi gently patted my head.

"It's normal for a girl to act like that" he said. "I'm glad that you weren't hurt"

He smiled. I could not describe what kind of smile that he had. It was not his usual smile, and it was not his prank smile either. For some reason, I felt warm just by looking at him.

"You're face is red. Do you have a fever?"

"What? No no!" I squeaked. I was sure that made Vronne was laughing behind me.

"ooh~" She said. We both turned around and we saw Vronne smiling like she knew everything.

"Vronne!" I growled.

"A friend of yours?"

"More or less" I replied reluctantly.

"You must be Lavi!" She smiled. "Do you know that Nicole could actually draw-"

"You!" I was about push her down, but I was able to control myself because of Lavi.

"You can draw?" He was astonished and went closer to Vronne. "Tell me something I don't know" He whispered.

"No, I don't!" I denied.

"She can write stories and she has a very nice voice" She said as found my notebook filled with stories from my bag.

"VRONNE!" I realized her motive right away. She was selling me out.

"You're being unfair, Princess" He said so suddenly. "How come you can openly say everything about yourself to her than to me?"

"Wait! That's not-" I ran to him and pleaded. "That's not true Lavi!"

"I…I…" he then gently pushed me away."I need to go." after that, he immediately left my room.

I fell on my knees and stared blankly at the door. I did not know what had just happened. I felt so stupid at that moment.

"See what you did? Lavi is angry at me now!" I pouted. I could not believe I was blaming on Vronne, but I was utterly embarrassed that something like this had happened.

"Who would be angry with those puppy dog eyes" she said playfully.

"What puppy dog eyes!" I glared at her, but she just sighed at me like I was a disappointment. "Just you wait, I'll get my revenge!"

"Just admit that you're falling for him."

"For the nth time Vronne! I am not in love with him!" I concluded and I grabbed my bag and notebook and left the room.

I was not going to lose her easily. She followed me all the way to the training room. There, I took my arnis sticks and pointed at her. "What do you want from me?"

"Your realization" She answered and took one of the wooden sticks. "How about we do a duel? If you win, I won't annoy you anymore. But if I win, you have to confess your feelings that that person."

This might be a trap, I though. I began questioning her motives and objectives. What would she gain from all this? But then again, she did say that would not bother me anymore. So I accepted her challenge.

"Oh I may warn you. I'm was trained by a great Rain Guardian"

"Well... I was trained by a Demon King." we both exchange statements and began to fight.

We fought for more than an hour, and we have not found out who won. We were evenly matched. She was really good with the sword. I could not bring her down easily, but I did not want to give up. I was about to give a counterattack when I felt a strain from my scars. I fell down and felt the intense pain. It was not craps, it was like burns and I was suffering from it.

"Hey! What's wrong?" I could not answer Vronne. It was too painful for me to talk. She noticed this and began calling for help. "Help! Somebody!"

"What happened?" I suddenly heard another person coming this way. I had lost my vision temporarily and my hearing became bad as well. I did not what they were saying, but I tried my best to stay conscious. Then, I felt a sudden lift of my body.

That person said something but I could not hear it.

"What…" I said. Then I realized.

"I'm here now, just hold on a little longer." Lavi said it close to my ear. For some reason I wanted to cry. It was not because of the pain, but it was because of the warmth that he had given me from his back.

It was then I remembered how I fell in love with the series. It was not only because it was an action manga, nor it was those memorable quotes, but it was because I got to see someone like him in the manga and anime.

His smile, his pain, and his warmth... It made me want to be by side. it had always been my thought in supporting him in his goal. However, when I was at his side, it was not enough.

Those memories of him made me feel embarrassed and aware of my true feelings...

I knew now that he was more than just a Bookman successor to me.

I knew now that he was more than just a Brother figure or a Friend.

Because of this feeling, I knew now that I loved him.

* * *

><p>Nicole: you seem to be in the festive mood<p>

Untiedgeneration: My friends and family always say that you should be thankful for the blessings that people give you. I thank you all for reviewing. It really means a lot to me :)


	2. Chapter 2

I was back in my room once more. When I realized my true feelings, I suddenly felt embarrassed about it. Why? Why did not realize it sooner. I must have been really dense-No, I was seriously dense. It was no wonder my friends gave up on me back in highschool. Even though they were the first ones who gave signs about it.

I kept saying stupid in my head as I childishly punched my pillow. I never knew this feeling. I couldn't believe that it was this warm.

"YAY! We're having a slumber party!" Vronne suddenly appeared and began rummaging into my room. "Where are your Pj's Nicole!"

"What the hell are you doing here Vronne!" I hissed as I grabbed my stuff back from her hands.

"The doctor said that you need rest! I'm helping you out since I'm your friend!" She replied. I sighed for I was not in the mood to retaliate.

"You shouldn't push yourself princess" Lavi suddenly appeared in the room. I looked at him for a second, but I immediately covered my face with a pillow. Great, I couldn't look at him with feeling embarrassed anymore, I thought.

"Princess?" He placed his hand on my head. I could feel the warmth; that made my heart beat faster. Unconsciously, I pushed him away.

_"what the hell am I doing?" _ I realized what I did.

"Did something happened?" I overheard their conversation.

"she's just tired and hungry." Vronne replied.

"Oh…" I feel guilty when he said that. Was it really okay to leave it that way? I could not. I would not. I needed to say something, at least to ease the tension.

"Lavi… is it okay if you bring me some chicken congee?" I asked, but I was still lying on my bed. "I'm a bit hungry, but I can't get out" it was partly true, I was indeed hungry, but I did not want to see him for a while and it took me a lot of courage just by saying that.

"Anything for you princess" he smiled and went out of the room. After that, I exhaled deeply and buried myself with my blanket.

"So, since you're aware of your feelings, are you going to confess?" she asked.

"I…" I hesitated. "I.. Can't.. I want to.. But I can't…"

"Why?"

"Because… I'm afraid" I answered. " Deep in heart, I know now that I love him. However a part of me is frightened. I am afraid that I might lose him because of my words. I am afraid that he won't feel the same way as I do. We live in different worlds. He is a Bookman successor, he belongs to this world. And I am from a world that is beyond reach and there will be a time that I need to go back. So I know that our love will never go through."

"You're being stupid." She said so bluntly.

"Is it really?" I replied as tears began to pour from my eyes. "I am stupid. I know that we were never meant to be. There's no way… But, knowing my feelings is enough. I just want to be by his side. "

"He'll be happy coz' he knows you trust him completely and that you are happy that he cares for you, he is happy when you are happy" she said and gave me a hug. "you don't have to rush about confessing but make sure it's not too late to let him know… think of it as showing how you feel little by little"

Her words made me thought of a way of expressing it to my first love.

It had been a long time that someone said something like that to me. That moment, I almost thought that she was an schoolmate who suddenly appeared just to cheer me up.

My thoughts suddenly came true.

I heard something falling from the floor. It was a small round pin. It was familiar, really familiar. I picked it up and I knew what it was.

It was pin of my school.

"Hey, that's mine." She grabbed her pin and placed it back in her pocket.

"Where did you get that?" I asked.

"Oh, you may not know it, but this is the seal of my school" my eyes widened that she was really my schoolmate.

"I… I do know it…" I stuttered. "You're from the College division right?"

"Huh? How did you know?" I took out my pin from my bag, she was shocked as well.

"Wait! Then what course-"

"Psychology!" we said simultaneously.

"HOW DID YOU GET HERE?" I shook her as hard as I could.

"I.. Got.. Transported into another world just like you." she answered as she tried not to vomit.

"What world?" Then her ring began to glow with a blue light. It was so bright that it devoured the whole room. I blinked a few times and I saw another person who was standing in my room.

"VROI! There you are!" He said. That long silver hair, that Varia uniform, he was no doubt that he was from another world. I knew because I also read and watched the series.

"Superbia Squalo?" I shouted unconsciously.

"How do you know his/my name?" they said the same question at the same time. Squalo quickly drew his sword from his left arm and pointed it at me.

"Are you the one who kidnapped Vronne" he threatened and I gulped.

"HELL NO!"

"Vronne! Control your boyfriend!" I shouted.

"He's not my boyfriend!" her eyes widened and looked at Squalo. Then, she looked back but this time her face was all red.

"LIES!" I retorted as I was about to make another step but I felt the killing aura around the silvered hair Rain Guardian. "V-Vronne!"

"PRINCESS!" Lavi destroyed the door when he heard my shriek. "Who the hell are you?" He activated his weapon and glared at the swordsman.

"I could ask the same thing." Squalo smirked.

They were about to have a battle… and it was inside my room. Since I did not want to get anything damage, especially myself, I shouted.

"Knock it off!" I was about to hit them on the head but Vronne made the initiative once again.

"Voi! What was that for?" He said. "Is this what I get for finding you?"

"I didn't ask you to find me" Vronne pouted. "Xanxus said that it was okay"

The more I listened to them, the more that I was familiar with the fight. I realized that it was a lover's quarrel. I let out a 'pfft' from my lips for this was the famous Rain Guardian that she was talking about.

"What's so funny?" I could tell that her face was all flustered from Squalo's presence. I guessed she had a hard time as well.

"I think that you guys should go home" I sighed. I prayed that more members of the Varia would come here; the story had enough of her mishaps.

"No"

"No?" The three of us said simultaneously for Vronne's response.

"Not until I finish my mission" she replied.

I thought her mission was already finished since she had already knew my feelings for Lavi.

"I have another one actually. " She went closer to Lavi. I was scared of what she was going to say. She might tell him how I felt about him- or worse. But no, she did not. Instead, she said.

"Nicole will sing something as a thank you for Lavi" My eyes widened from shock.

"Vronne!"

"… And you have to sing with her" She pointed at Lavi. I could not believe it. I was going to do a duet with Lavi.

"What?" Lavi stuttered and I was completely speechless.

She took out one of my notebooks and gave it immediately to Lavi.

"Here Lavi" She smiled and she pointed the lyrics that I copied for my singing contest in my highschool. "This one is really easy."

It was a song entitled Terrified by Katherine McPhee

I did not know where it came from, but she took an acoustic guitar from her hand. She asked Squalo to wait a longer for it was something important. She started playing, I was so nervous that I did not know if I could sing or not. Even worse, I could not even sing it with Lavi.

"Psst… Nicole" Vronne whispered. "Sing!"

Not a single sound came from my mouth; then Vronne started singing as well.

**You, by the light**

**Is the greatest find**

**In a world full of wrong**

**You're the thing that's right**

**Finally made it through the lonely**

**To the other side**

I still could not able to sing with her; even with the chorus. Then it in that moment that Lavi joined in.

**You set it again, my heart's in motion**

**Every word feels like a shooting star**

**I'm at the edge of my emotions**

**Watching the shadows burning in the dark**

**And I'm in love**

**And I'm terrified**

**For the first time and the last time**

**In my only life**

When he started singing, it was as if the world around me stopped. I was mesmerized by his voice; I never knew that he could sing so well. I stared at him and he stared at me. I could not even produce a single sound from my mouth but he did it for me. He noticed and held my cold and nervous hand, saying that everything is going to be alright.

It was in the second verse that I started singing.

**And this could be good**

**It's already better than that**

**And nothing's worse**

**Than knowing you're holding back**

**I could be all that you need**

**If you let me try**

Then it was only me and Lavi singing without hesitation this time.

**You set it again, my heart's in motion**

**Every word feels like a shooting star**

**I'm at the edge of my emotions**

**Watching the shadows burning in the dark**

**And I'm in love**

**And I'm terrified**

**For the first time and the last time**

**In my only...**

**I only said it 'cause I mean it**

**I only mean 'cause it's true**

**So don't you doubt what I've been dreaming**

**'Cause it fills me up and holds me close whenever I'm without you**

**You set it again, my heart's in motion**

**Every word feels like a shooting star**

**Watching the shadows burning in the dark**

**And I'm in love**

**And I'm terrified**

**For the first time and the last time**

**In my only...**

**Life**

We stared at each other this whole time and I did not even realize it. For some reason, I wanted to dedicate this song to him. I did not care if I was bad at singing, I did not care if Vronne had seen it. I wanted my feelings to reach him.

"…In my only…"

"…life…" I opened my eyes and I saw Lavi's smiling face. It was truly warm. I was glad that I was able to sing my feelings out.

"I'm surprised that you can sing" I laughed lightly. It was truly a dream come true for me.

"You have a beautiful voice princess" Lavi said. We were really close to each other. I seriously wanted to-

"AHEM!" Squalo finally interrupted. I looked at Lavi again and began to blush intensively. I turned around and cleared my throat.

"S-satisfied Vronne?" I said as I hid my face from Lavi.

"Must you ruin everything?" Vronne slapped the Rain Guardian from the back.

"We're done here" Squalo suddenly pulled Vronne to his side. "See you!"

"Wah! Squalo I don't want to go yet!" but resistance was futile for her. After a while, I saw something dropped from the window. It was starting to glow with different lights. Squalo suddenly carried Vronne in a bridal way and they were about to jump out of the window.

"No!" I did not expect this. The moment that they jumped, I was grabbed by Vronne.

"VRONNE?" I was being dragged down from a really high place. Luckily, Lavi grabbed me in the nick of time.

"Nicole! I have a confession to make." Vronne said. "I was the one who started the robot!"

"You WHAT!" so it was her fault that I almost lost my purity. I did not know how I feel that moment. Should I be mad at her or should I be thankful at her. I was in the mix.

Then her hand slipped and fell into the light. They were gone, and Lavi pulled me back up.

"They were a weird pair" Lavi panted and I laughed.

At that time, I felt something from my hand. it was a small ring. I guessed it was harmless, so I placed it in my pocket and I looked at my first love.

He reached out his hand for me, and I held it tightly. I would never forget this feeling. Truly, it was the best feeling I had in my life. As we held hands and walked out from the room, a simple thought came to my mind.

I love him more than anything in the world.

* * *

><p>UntiedGeneration: err... I'm promoting a fanfic in KHR. I think this is a crossover.<p>

Nicole: you suddenly made it a crossover.

Vronne: We're going to have a new story soon! And it involves-

Squalo: Voi! Don't spoil the readers!

UntiedGeneration: I hope you like it! I hope you like Vronne too. she's one of the new characters in the KHR fanfic. I might post it here with the permission with a certain person. -blush- p-please... -runs-


End file.
